The Sincerest Form of Flattery Doesn’t Feel Very Flattering.
Ah, summer. I can tell it is here because I am wearing a sundress, looking out the window at a bright, green world…and sitting in my office on a Saturday.
Why does my busy season, the season of looming deadlines and excessive overtime, have to coincide with the one part of the Minnesota year when it is warm enough to sit outside and read? Reading outside is my favorite activity—if I believed in an afterlife, I would hope it involved sitting on a deck with a drink in hand and a book in my lap. For eternity.
But instead here I am. Waiting for an upload to run, and thinking about plagiarism.
Someone has plagiarized my blog—a paragraph here, a (delightful, obviously) phrase there—and passed it off as her own work. At first I thought it was an honest mistake. Perhaps a certain turn of phrase stuck in her head and she used it in her entry not knowing where it was from. This has probably happened to all of us.
But no. Entire sentences, word for word, lifted from entries I wrote in 2005.
My first instinct was to hunt her down and bludgeon her with a copy of the US Code, Title 17. But I settled for eating a bagel while feeling sad and violated.
Perhaps I am being a bit silly, getting so upset about this—it was only my blog, not any publishable writing—but I can’t help myself. It makes me wonder whether keeping this website is such a good idea after all.
I cannot understand any ostensible writer who steals from another. Period. Whether the writing they steal is “worth stealing” is hardly the point. It is the lack of consideration, the crass disrespect for the person behind the work they obviously admire enough to pass off as theirs. Most perplexing, to me, is the fact that the excerpts stolen were personal, and about my infertility. Why would someone co-opt the experience of another infertile woman rather than honestly sharing her own?
The other astonishing aspect was how blatant the plagiarism is. I wasn’t trolling the web looking for people infringing upon my copyright. I found the entry in the course of surfing infertility blogs, merely by clicking a link on a blog I sometimes visit. I am astonished that the plagiarist would not expect me to find and notice the post, especially when the stolen portions were unchanged except by substituting her name for mine and her husband’s name for Scott’s. And yet I do believe that she intended to keep me from finding it. While she obviously reads my site (including my archives), she has never left a comment, and I am conspicuously absent from her blogroll—both, presumably, so that I could not follow her back to her page.
Not that I expect to be on the blogroll of all my readers, but if you like me enough to plagiarize me…well, I damn well better be getting a link, is all I’m saying.
I am not going to link to the blogger, so don’t even ask. First of all, I don’t want to embarrass her any more than necessary. And secondly, I don’t want her to stop blogging. It has been such a wonderful thing for me, this website, especially when dealing with infertility and miscarriage. I would hate to feel I had helped to deprive someone of this community.
But I’m still angry, and hurt. Feel free to tell me if I am overreacting—what would you do? How would you feel? Are we naive to expect to post our writing online without being plagiarized? Is it foolish to think that a tiny copyright notice in the sidebar will dissuade people from pseudo-literary vandalism? And then, what did you think of Hung in the Top Chef premiere: irredeemable asshole, or culinary genius?
34 Comments
Wow, I don’t really know what to say. Why would someone plagarize from one blog to another? The whole point of a blog is to have a place to put your OWN thoughts, feelings, etc. out there and to connect with others. By stealing someone else’s work, it’s completely lying to an entire community of people. And an INFERTILITY blog??!! That’s a pretty gigantic wealth of material from which to write.
I just don’t get it, AT ALL. Hopefully, she will read this and stop now.
I don’t think you are overreacting. Mainly I just think its creepy as hell. Kind of like a version of identify theft. This is slightly off-topic, but when my wallet got stolen and someone used my credit cards- it felt icky, like a peeping tom had seen me undressing in my bedroom. That’s what this reminds me of.
Very bizarre…
I don’t know either. I agree that it’s hard not to accidentally “borrow” a writing style, or even a turn of phrase here and there, from writers you read often and enjoy immensely. However, to copy a sentence, word for word in its entirety, and much more a whole paragraph? Or SEVERAL paragraphs? I just can’t understand it myself.
To me, the greatest puzzle lies not in how one could disrespect the ACTUAL writer (although this is puzzling) but rather in what the thief enjoys about having a blog at all. I don’t know, maybe it’s naive, but I always assume that everyone is like me, tapping their blog entries out painstakingly, or typing furiously in the heat of anger, or pausing to laugh mid-sentence in the midst of excitement. Enjoying the process of writing much more than the result once it’s posted on the page.
To steal from someone else devalues the whole process. The thief isn’t having those feelings, the trouble of choosing the perfect word, the thesaurus trolling. All they’re doing is highlighting, hitting control C and then control V. Or, you know, right clicking and selecting. Either way, a thief is not engaging in a process. They’re engaging in a series of clicks.
What you’re doing, when you plagiarize - it’s not even as good as shallow and banal. It’s NOTHING. You are contributing nothing. And if you are having an experience that is worthy of such a process a writer would go through to express it - well, you’re devaluing your own process and, by default, yourself, by choosing to express it in a series of copy and paste and thievery.
Alexa, if she is plagarizing your writing, who is to say she is not plagarizing your life as well. She may be as infertile as Mrs. Duggar for all that we know. You either feel infertility/miscarriage or you don’t. If she is stealing your words, she doesn’t.
If you do nothing else, you should send her an email to let her know that you know. And no, you are not overreacting by being hurt. In fact, I think you are being too generous with your kindness. I would have went with your first instinct: a good bludgeoning.
That sucks. I agree with DD. You are being far too kind.
At the same time though, you have to feel for someone who feels so 1. unsure, 2. unhappy, 3. ungrounded (choose one or all of the above,) as to need to steal from someone else’s life story to pad their own. Surely the person has issues that reach far beyond plagiarism.
I must say though, she does have exceptionally good taste in writing. :)
Why cut her any slack at all? Link to her site. Let the bright light of informed readership flood into her plagiarized blog. You can feel compassion that she’s struggling with infertility, but that doesn’t give her a free pass for theft, which is what plagiarism is. She’s a liar. By publishing stolen words, she’s lying to every single one of her readers.
It wasn’t me, was it? I just have to check.
WOW, they say thats the rawest form of flattery. Although, I’d be pissed off and ready for bloodshed - so no , you are not over-reacting
NOT an over-reaction on your part. As Mr T would say, however, “I pity the fool” who can’t think up her own stuff, especially about something so personal. It’s cheesy, it’s crass, and it’s STEALING.
I just don’t know why someone would do that. As you say, a phrase here or there might be an unintentional mistake, but a whole paragraph word for word clearly is not. I’m really sorry that you have been violated like this Alexa, and I really hope that it stops here.
Wow - I can’t believe it. I mean, I do believe it, but that really sucks. How odd.
“it was only my blog, not any publishable writing”–Sweetie, your blog is published and, should you ever choose to write a book, publishable. It’s copyrighted. You’re not overreacting. This is identity theft. She’s taking your life and transforming it into her own. Why doesn’t matter, though you are a good person for caring. And a better person for not linking her.
When I first read your entry, I wondered to myself “Is it me?” because I do admire your writing and sometimes your turns of phrase stick in my head and I find myself using them. I could understand how other would do the same. You’re very gifted. But lifiting whole entire paragraphs and changing names? I’m sorry but I think that calls for prosecution. It’s lexicographal rape. (Like how I just made up that word? I have skillz like that.)
I’m just so mad. You’ve been through enough.
About a year ago, I was doing a spam purge when I noticed a message with some very familiar phrasing. Someone had spammed me with my own blog. That is to say, they had copied posts and sent them around with viagra ads. I felt violated too. Even though no one else put their name on my stuff, I wasn’t thrilled that my words were being used by spammer.
You have every right to feel violated. I agree with DD. I would suggest an email that politely but firmly asks her to stop.
I was quite amazed to read about this and I agree about sending an email but a nice one because you don’t know what this persons going though, then again she has probably already read this post and is deleting as we speak!
and Moose’s story too! Worrying that any of this can even happen!
You are not overreacting. I agree with your angrier commenters — you’re very kind for not revealing who she is or taking further action against her, but given that she is BLATANTLY STEALING from you, you have every right to do those things. Don’t undervalue what you’ve written here.
OUCH.
This hasn’t happened to me, but I know I’ve been nonplussed now and then to see certain images or analogies I (…think I) created appropriated on someone else’s blog. I can only imagine how upsetting it must be to have entire chunks stolen outright. I am sorry this has happened to you.
Of course you are outraged, with good reason. It’s outrageous. I say name and shame, and make them stop. You have a right to your own copyrighted material. Something similar is why grrl took down her blog, I’d hate to have you have to do the same.
That’s just bizarre. Can she not just express herself, herself? I mean what the hell is the point? What kind of gain is lifting someone else’s words from their blog? I’ve had my photographs stolen and used by others - but I haven’t actually had someone lift them and say that they were their own. That would seriously tick me off. And my personal writing? Just too strange. I think you are completely right to feel violated. I hope she reads your entry and realizes you are onto her. You might want to send a nasty e-mail–it is your copyrighted material–and you could take some action, of the legal kind.
One of my posts became an Internet urban legend. It SUCKED. I received it as a FORWARD from a friend of mine. A FORWARD, with the words, “How funny is this? I could see it happening to you.” Which um, actually, IT DID.
It was one of those goddamn incredibly annoying things everyone says with an assload of of those awful right-facing carats and poor comments in the front from strangers who don’t know me, and said it was from “their friend Jane,” etc. etc.
I was pissed, but how do you stop a moving train like that?
With regard to stealing turns of phrase, which is NOT the same thing that happened to you…I’m SURE I’m guilty of it. I’m very susceptible to remembering analogies people made, and I’m fairly certain that other people are the same way. The blogosphere is so small sometimes, half the phrases that have become so popular seem to have lost any origin.
I’m so sorry, Alexa. That’s so miserable, just MISERABLE. I understand the desire to want to beat her over the head with a giant stack of copyright law. It IS copyrighted, Flicka is right.
Dude, I’d so send her an e-mail. Call her out on it.
Are you sure it wasn’t a spam blog? I find copies of my posts on spam blogs every now and then… they can be pretty tricky, and look pretty real at first blush. If there are a bunch of Google ads & the like all over the template, that’s a good hint. Beyond that, I just cannot fathom the motivation. Too weird.
Hi Alexa,
You are just being way nicer to her than I would be. She wishes she were as witty and as good a writer as you are.
One thing she can’t steal is your gorgeous wedding photos. I am looking forward to more.
You are incredibly kind not wanting to embarrass her.
M.
Absolutely you should email her to let her know you are aware of her existence and her theft. If nothing else, it will (hopefully) stop her from doing it again!
Heather Mills, Paul McCartney’s second wife apparently was a big plagiarist. She’s also, by all accounts, a big sociopath. Stealing someone else’s words certainly does show a certain lack of conscience. When you send that email, take care: Write softly and carry a big freaking stick!
track her down and teach her a big fat lesson. I’ve had a few post “ideas” borrowed from my blog and it totally pissed me off. if you indeed experienced blatant plagiarism that woman needs to be stopped. we support you!
I’ve been reading your blog for a while and never commented, but after reading this post I feel compelled to shed any creepiness from staying silent all this time!
Anyway, thank you for your blog. This is one of the few blogs that I check frequently, and although we may not have much in common (I’m a grad student, far removed from having children, more of a musician than a writer), I am constantly impressed and amused by your writing. So, please, keep the blog going!
This is only marginally relevant, but I grade college-level papers for my job and the profusion of plagiarism never fails to shock me. Students will lift entire paragraphs from the internet (without even adjusting the formatting and phrases like “see figure below”) and I think that some of them really believe that they’re doing nothing wrong. According to professors, plagiarism is only becoming more rampant, and so it’s not even that surprising to me that it’s spilling over to blogs. But still, I’m sorry that this happened to you!
I agree with those who wonder what the hell this person is getting out of blogging if she is not sharing HER OWN thoughts and feelings. I mean, plagiarizing in a college paper, while totally reprehensible, you can at least see how and why it might happen. But with a blog…even if you feel that someone else has managed to capture EXACTLY how you feel, word for word, why not just link to that person with a “What she said”–as I have certainly done myself.
Though, now I’m wondering if I may have inadvertently appropriated some of Julie’s phraseology myself. Damn.
I hope this doesn’t negatively impact your own posting, the way it did for Grrl (who had to remove all her archives).
She might not be infertile at all. There are now countless stories of people lifting material from blogs about family troubles, sick (even dying) children, infertility, illness, and disease, publishing it as their own, and enjoying the sense of “community”…until someone realizes the plagiarist’s “story” is remarkably similar to someone else’s.
Bottom line, it’s cheap, it’s cruel, and it’s wrong.
That is truly bizarre, and, yeah, I would be pretty pissed. On one hand, maybe she just liked the way you said it. On the other hand, it’s called “write this in your own words.”
I’d be seriously pissed and you’re definitely not overreacting. Having a blog is supposed to allow you to write your OWN feelings, not someone else’s. Even if you’re reluctant to out her in public right now, an e-mail to let her know that a) you know, b) you’re not cool with it, and c) if she doesn’t quit, you WILL out her, would be totally appropriate.
That said, I’m also SHOCKED at how often my students turn in plagiarized papers. It’s especially shocking given that I make them submit their papers both as a hard copy and to a plagiarism-checking website, and they KNOW that each paper is going to be checked for copying. I don’t understand how people can do that.
If the blogger is a real person that kind of plagarism is another form of compulsive lying. I have unfortunately had a compulsive liar in my life and one of her classic behaviors was to co-op stories that she heard as things that actually happened in her life. It’s often part of an underlying personality disorder. Not that I have any credentials at all that allow me to make this diagnosis but it’s my bet you’re not dealing with someone who has all of her (or his) faculties intact. That’s not to take away from the seriousness of the act. It is violating. Completely. You are not overreacting at all. Often people with these kind of problems have no regard for the rights and boundaries of others. What you are feeling is entirely just. I’m sorry that it happened to you because it’s pretty fucking lousy.
I wouldn’t publicly call her out, although I would seriously consider dropping her an email, but that’s just me.
I think it’s pathetic. I would take it as flattery and chalk it up to another pathetic person in the world.
Like whoever said, why would anyone another writer’s words to express their own feelings regarding fertility.
Let’s get Watson’s mom to put a curse on her!
WTF-Who does that? Seriously. I would be furious and I would most definitely call her out.
I’ll just add my voice to the general outcry. I, like some of the other commenters, at first was concerned that it was I to whom you were referring. (I have enjoyed many an entry in your archive, particularly your discussion about cooter maintenance.) However, it sounds like this was not accidental, but complete and total plagiarism. It’s flattering, yes, but not in a good way. I would try to e-mail her, too. She needs to be confronted.
Well, at least she owned up to it, although that still doesn’t make it okay. I had this happen to me last year and I felt violated, the same as when our home was broken into.
It makes you feel less “safe” as the case may be and makes you wonder why you are so stupidly trusting as to share your original work with people who might steal it. I hope this is the end of it.
You know, I never understood that. Doing it in college for a paper is one thing, and not saying I agree with it at all, but I can understand why people do it. Laziness, mostly, I guess. But seriously, copying someone’s blog? Like, what the fuck is the point? My blog is nothing great. It’s liquid brain poo, perfected into an art form. Which is to say, it’s shit. But it’s my shit, and why anyone else would want to steal that, the whole thing perplexes me.
I mean, why even bother starting a blog, if you’re going to steal someone else’s work? I’m too fucking lazy for that.