Wasted.

I had quite a night.
My headache was still there when I woke up at midnight to pee and change my bag of frozen vegetables, but by my two o’ clock trip to the bathroom, it was gone. I settled happily back sleep…and then my beloved husband began to snore.
Now, he has never been a snorer before, so I can only assume he took up the habit last night solely to irk me. I poked at him. He snored louder and rolled over, nearly pushing me off the bed. This has been a theme lately—the cats know Scott is a soft touch, so they take over his side of the bed, causing him to roll over to my side. I am left with about three inches of space, and when I ask him to kindly move his bony knees to his goddamn side of the mattress, darling, he says he cannot bear to disturb the cats. Disturb the cats! I ask you! Never mind his pregnant wife, oh no, the cats, they need their beauty sleep.
Anyway, Scott rolled over, I poked him, he snored some more, and I wondered whether I had enough money in my checking account for a hotel. And then Lennie, formerly my favorite cat, started having a very loud and animated conversation with a bit of peeling paint in the corner.
So when my alarm went off at 5:30, I shook myself out of my reverie (considering potential materials for a barrier down the middle of the bed—a strip of carpet tacks seemed about right) and staggered to the computer to send an out of office form. The pocket part is finished, and I needed a day off. Besides, think off all I could accomplish!
I got back up at seven with the best of intentions, and then somehow the day got away from me.

Here is what I intended to do on my day off:
-Have breakfast out with husband
-Go to Target
-Update driver’s license at DMV
-Pay bills, put finances in order
-Order maternity jeans in larger size
-Clean bathroom
-Take shower
-Write inspirational blog entry
-Return unanswered email
-Make series of useful lists
-Sort laundry
-Study for CLEP test
-Load dishwasher
-Prepare healthful dinner for self and husband

Here is what I actually did on my day off:
-Had breakfast out with husband
-Took three-hour nap
-Aimlessly surfed Etsy
-Showered
-Gathered clothes from bedroom floor and crammed into laundry basket
-Greeted husband’s return from work with suggestion he run out and get us a frozen pizza

How does this happen? For weeks now, I have been whining unattractively about my workload, and musing that if ONLY I had a day off, I would use it wisely and well, I would run errands and organize things and clean out my handbag, maybe, and neatly weave the loose ends of all my half-started projects into a beautiful tapestry. And here I am, installed on the couch, wearing a tank top and housepants without underwear because I have none clean, waiting for my pizza to be ready and wondering how much longer I have to stay up before I can call it a day and go to bed.
Do you think I can blame the babies?