From the ventilator, to rated CPAP, to normal CPAP, to a high-flow nasal cannula—all in 72 hours. Obviously my child is some sort of breathing prodigy, if you ignore the fact that the “all in 72 hours” happened seven weeks after her birth. But surely that is a minor detail. “Genius of respiration” it is!
She’s […]
When I first found the discussion alluded to in my last entry, my intent was to ignore it entirely, as is my policy in such situations. Imagine my surprise to find that my other cheek simply would not turn that far. This has jeopardized my standing as a card-carrying member of Pathologically Conflict Averse Citizens […]
Dear Commenters on a Certain Childfree Site,
Hi! I don’t think we’ve met. I am the mother—excuse me, “Moo”—of the “hideous” “fugly” baby in which you have taken such a keen interest. I confess that this first part perplexes me, as I had always thought the childfree weren’t particularly interested in children, and yet here you […]
I had a hair appointment on Friday, scheduled weeks before. It was to be my first midday outing away from the NICU—I am at the hospital approximately eight hours at a time, and haven’t missed a day yet. Not because I am particularly stalwart, mind you: I seem to have some post traumatic stress from […]
Simone lasted 22 hours on CPAP. Surprisingly, she had only one apnea episode—this time she remembered to breathe, but simply couldn’t do it well enough to clear carbon dioxide and keep her wee alveoli from collapsing. It was too hard; she was too small and her chest muscles too underdeveloped. But by god she tried. […]
It has been a week free of fresh disasters, and so the plan is to try extubating to CPAP this afternoon. Again.
Simone wasn’t wild about the process last time, and I have been trying to explain to her about Choosing Your Battles.
After finding her sound asleep in the following pose, I am not sure […]
Saturday you were one month old. You nestled against me, one arm thrown companionably over my right breast, your feet pressing into my hand. When I spoke, your irises rolled toward the top of your head, looking for the source of my voice. Though I wish you were still safe inside me instead of running […]
When I called the NICU in the wee hours of yesterday morning, Simone was doing well.
“No, no blood in her urine,” said the nurse, “And they said she had some bruising on her groin? And that her leg was dusky? But I don’t see anything like that.”
My god, I thought blearily, she’s got the wrong […]
The big news today was supposed to be a trial of extubation. Simone has a large air leak around her tube that makes her sound like a flock of geese, probably because she has outgrown said tube and needs the next size up. So as long as they were pulling it out, quoth the neonatologist, […]
In predictably unpredictable NICU fashion, Simone had a difficult day after my last entry. She stopped peeing, her oxygen needs increased, and she had her first bad nurse, a woman who both failed to find me charming and kept slamming the isolette portholes even after I asked her to for the love of god stop […]
