April 2008

Or Two Small Ostrich Eggs.

April 30, 2008

We moved Saturday, and all that up and down the stairs meant that Sunday, the morning of the march, I awoke with my calf muscles curled into tight balls like frightened hedgehogs. But I did it, I Marched Shuffled for Babies, and I had a wonderful time. The weather was quite nice in the end, [...]

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S Minus About Two Weeks.

April 25, 2008

After the 800th commenter swore that she would sell her grandmother for a Miracle Blanket, I hied myself to the website and ordered two. My baby adores a swaddle, and I got a bit nervous when a nurse mentioned that once I am home I will only be able to swaddle Simone below the arms, [...]

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Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Babies*

April 22, 2008

[SCENE: A lavishly appointed NICU ROOM. NURSE PRACTITIONER—formerly seen in Act I: A Streetcar Named TRACHEOSTOMY—pulls up a chair. ALEXA looks up from LAPTOP, visibly ALARMED.] NURSE PRACTITIONER: So, I just want to prepare you… ALEXA’S INNER MONOLOGUE: Oh god, WHAT NOW? NURSE PRACTITIONER: …for the fact that things may start moving quickly now that [...]

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Dueling Banjos.

April 19, 2008

I must admit, I am exhausted. The last few days were harder to handle than some of our other NICU catastrophes (collect them all!) because things had been going so well. Simone had come off the high flow and was on a regular nasal cannula. Her ROP was improving in one eye and stable in [...]

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Just When You Thought it Was Safe to Buy Crib Sheets.

April 17, 2008

(7 spells of severe apnea) + (1 manual bagging) + (1 return from minimal O2 to High Flow) + (1 failed bladder tap) + (1 catheterization) + (1 blown IV) + (1 successful IV) + (1 blood culture) + (1 elevated CRP) + (1 dive off the preemie growth chart) + (2 mentions of “tracheostomy”) [...]

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Splish.

April 13, 2008

Thursday I signed onto my checking account and found my money missing. “J’accuse!” shrilled the minus sign before my balance, and I scrolled through my transactions in a panic. How had this happened? The $200 in overdraft fees lovingly applied by my bank hadn’t helped, but it appeared the real culprit was a mysterious transfer [...]

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Def Leper.

April 9, 2008

So, how do you like the redesign? I seem to be all about fresh starts these days, and this particular new leaf was easy to turn over thanks to the very patient and talented Margot, who not only designed all this but also put up with my (patent pending) patois of perfectionism and clumsiness. When [...]

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A Deluxe Apartment in the Sky.

April 1, 2008

Simone seems to be doing well, and I have an hour to myself, so I feel it is time to tell you a tale of latent homosexuality, alcohol abuse, and truly hideous red and white tile—also known as the story of how we came to be moving at the end of this month. Yes, we [...]

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