Reasons I’m Not Posting Today.
1.
It is actually much worse than it looks. No one burns more easily and through higher SPFs than I.
2. This morning my mother informed me that she HASN’T BEEN READING MY POSTS for the last few days. Surely, you are thinking, there has been a terrible accident—perhaps the crazy Italian who ran her down returned to finish the job?
No. She’s on VACATION in FRANCE. My mother, the one for whom I am slaving over a hot laptop, day in and day out, is too busy slinking in and out of wine caves to visit. It certainly does take the air out of one’s sails.
3. I have just taught myself to play Private Eyes on the xylophone, and I need to practice.
4. One of the cats scratched my hand. My best typing hand.
5. Simone would like me to read Are You My Mother? for the 17th consecutive time. (NO. I AM NOT YOUR MOTHER. MAYBE WHEN YOU FIND HER, SHE WILL READ TO YOU).
6. It is the sabbath, I think. For someone.
25 Comments
OUCH! I hope you’ve got something good for it, it looks painful.
My cat scratched my foot as I tripped over her. Spiteful thing, not only did I go down like a ton of bricks (and considerately, I didn’t land on her) but she swiped me as I went.
Ouchie! Advil and aloe vera should help. :)
And the nerve of your mother! After those emails practically begging you to post!
:)
Youch! Been there, done that, hope you feel better soon! Try to get that skin temp down… I do think solarcaine spray helps so you can sleep, and drinking lots of water.
Oh no! I feel partially responsible! Interested in an old home remedy passed down from generation to generation from the southern part of my family? Put sour cream on it. I know, I know. Seriously. Do it. It smells weird at first but once that goes away, it really helps.
Gah!
Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. I’m that pale too, ow. ow. Water, tons of aloe or water based lotions. Water. ow.
1. Aveeno makes SPF 90 products now. I.am.not.kidding.
2. How dare she!
3.Green with envy.
4. My new kittens have shredded my old curtains.
5.Not me, either.
6. Seventh Day Adventists.
7. Mike’s Hard Lemonade makes it all better. Even the xylophone.
It was the sabbath for me. You are welcome to use “in order not to offend Leigh Ann” as an excuse to not post any time.
(Although the irony that you DID post is not lost on me, even though at this point in the evening I am on my second glass of wine, thankyouverymuch.)
Owwwwwwwwwwwwwww. The others are right … aloe vera. And some Advil.
I’ll trade you “Are You My Mother?” for “Where is the Green Sheep?”
It was the sabbath for me too! Maybe try sneaking “Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See?” into the mix. Being brown and all myself, I’ve never experienced a (serious) sunburn, but I’m imagining what it must feel like, and ouch! I hope it heals quickly.
Ooh, I can feel that from here! I did the same thing to myself two weeks ago – 55 SPF every 3 hours, but still my arms shoulders, back, even the back of my hands are peeling. That coupled with today being day 13 of the IVF cycle that will never end and I’m just a little insane today…okay maybe a lot.
I once very nearly killed a boyfriend who insisted that I could not burn through a car windwow, as I sat there, burning through a car window. Now I have made red-headed children who are pretty much transparent. From experience, I say take Percoset. And I’ll be filing that sour cream idea away, if nothing else my husband will lick me.
Private eyes
They’re watching you
They see your every move.
Blinded by the red glow.
Poor you!
ouch. damp towels round the shoulders may help.
Aerosol Solarcaine. No need to touch the skin, just spray on cool, anaesthetizing relief. I’m of irish descent, but everyone asks me if I’m swedish. i’m that pale. I feel your pain alexa.
I’ll gladly stand in as proxy for your mother while she’s on vacation. She can catch up when she gets back from the wine country, and in the meantime you’ll know that I’m here every day, enjoying your posts.
Sorry about the sunburn, btw.
Do NOT do that again. My cousin is dying of skin cancer, leaving two teenagers behind. I like your blog – don’t leave it prematurely.
We read Are You My Mother at least 20 times a day to our two year old! Ugh. He now walks up to me in the kitchen and says, “You’re not my mother, you’re a snort right?” and so on…and on…and on…
OW. Do not put Noxzema on it. : )
Hope it feels better.
and your last post made me laugh so hard I can’t even begin to address all the whys. Just trust me, you are VERY funny. I wish I were going to BlogHer so I could rendezvous with you.
I reckon I could just about rival you. I’m either interestingly transluscent (ha!) or lobster red. Then I peel and repeat the sequence….
Blasted northern european genetics…
g
Why do they always LOVE the most annoyingly inane books. “Little Cloud”, by Eric Carle – Ugh. But, “Are you my Mother?” is a close second.
I’m the original White Chick. The girls in my office come in and compare their week-end tan’s to me. Since I live and work at the beach. I’m the one in the shade with hat,sunglasses and SPF 1000!!! Ok Ok it doesn’t go that high. On the upside, I’ll have good skin in my 90’s. If I was going to Blogher, I would look ya up and hang!
What’s up, is there anybody else here?
If there’s anyone else here, let me know.
Oh, and yes I’m a real person LOL.
See ya,
Oh that sunburn looks painful. The best burn stuff I ever used was spray Unguentine, but they no longer sell it. They used to make an ointment form of it which deadens ANY pain in seconds but who wants to smear thick, pasty ointment on burned skin?