Sep
23

Seek and Ye Shall Find.

Well, it seems unfair to leave your urgent questions unanswered any longer.

“pseudo compliment” meaning
Usually it means the person dislikes you, but is too much of a pussy to tell you directly, resorting instead to statements like “You’re so clever to have grown that insulating fat—heat costs are rising!”

flashing homeless
That’s sweet, but they’d probably prefer cash.

back side of tit & fit underwire bra
BACKside of tit? Does a tit HAVE a backside? Perhaps if you’d had that underwire bra fitted a bit sooner, you wouldn’t have this problem.

bladder traffic pee a12
As far as I can tell by conducting my own seaches, the A12 is likely a roadway. If you are trapped in traffic on the A12 in California, desperately in need of a restroom, you’ll want to know that it passes through Grenada one mile from its junction with Interstate 5. Further east, a town called Mayten has a convenience store, a church, and an elementary school. If none of these options are close enough, I am told the A12 runs through “an area with towering dark red crags and buttes to the north.” Do you see crags and buttes? Maybe you could squat behind one of those.

(Of course if you are referring to the A12 in Shanghai, none of this is of any help to you).

can alka-seltzer plus cause a false positive on pregnancy test
What do you think the “plus” stands for, exactly? Semen?

Let’s put it this way—you’re pregnant. Which is less likely to be the result of cold medicine than of all that unprotected sex you’ve been having.
Get well soon!

can i trim iud strings by myself
Unless you are the same person who got here by Googling clitorectomy, I would recommend against it.

cps trolling photo sites for messy homes
Hey—you’re kidding, aren’t you? Probably you’re kidding. I’m going to assume this was a joke, and you’re just not very funny. (So, to confirm: KIDDING?)

fat girdel fuckin
The thing I like about this search is the missing “g.” Because “fat girdel fucking” would be too formal.

marachino cherries toe pain
Unless “marachino” is a more sinister cousin of maraschino, I doubt very much that your toe pain is related to cherry consumption.

old fashioned food placeholder
I’m not sure what an “old fashioned food placeholder” is, to be perfectly honest. I assume it was something they had during the Great Depression, to make the table look less empty by illustrating where a succulent roast might go, if you weren’t dining on patties of your own hair.

photoes of misdemeanors in late childhood
Please enjoy this illustration from Oliver Twist:
Oliver_Twist_10

pictures of messy houses and apartments
NONE OF THOSE AROUND HERE! I AM COMPULSIVELY NEAT! BUT NOT IN AN UNHEALTHY, CHILD-SCOURING WAY! THOUGH I DO BATHE MY CHILD! GENTLY! SHE IS NOT IN NEED OF YOUR PROTECTIVE SERVICES!

should you sleep with lemon on your face
I don’t. But it’s a personal decision.

solipsistic kidney
Are you perhaps one of a pair, concerned that your partner thinks only of himself?

words to search for unreasonable cubicle conditions
How about “unreasonable cubicle conditions?”

wife tricked husband to wear a bra
I confess I am skeptical. How did she “trick” you, precisely? I assume, being married, that you are familiar with the garment—she is unlikely to have convinced you that it was some sort of pectoral exerciser. Did she pretend to cry, and when you went to her, arms outstretched, deftly loop the straps over your shoulders?

This is all sounding rather thin. I suggest you take a long, hard look at yourself. But take off the brassiere first.

typical menu for 18 month old
Breakfast: ½ child’s yogurt drink, concealed in cup of milk
Snack: Fruit residue remaining after expelling said fruit from mouth
Lunch: 1 nickel-sized bite chicken, 2 tsp nanny’s Lean Cuisine
Snack: Milk, ¾ saltine
Dinner: 2 centimeters hot dog, 2 fries (french)
Snack: Milk, salt of mother’s frustrated, desperate tears

By Alexa | Posted in Ceci N'est Pas Une Ecrivaine |