Comments on: Mirror.

By: Mary @ Holy Mackerel

Mary @ Holy Mackerel — Mon, 01 Feb 2010 21:32:58 +0000

I can’t imagine what that must be like. All I know is that it must be so very painful. Going over to hug Eve right now.

By: Amanda

Amanda — Fri, 29 Jan 2010 02:47:33 +0000

It happened differently for me. At my ultrasound appointment – routine, March 3rd, 2009 – the screen showed my two healthy baby boys kicking each other vigorously. Then the tech sent me, feeling finally a little relieved 22 weeks and 6 days into my IVF-assisted pregnancy, to pee and return for a quick cervix check. “When was your last ultrasound?” she asked, in a tone I couldn’t quite decipher. Three weeks ago. Then, “and did the doctor say anything about your cervix?” I was wheeled across the street and tilted back into trendelenburg. I was 5 cm dilated, with bulging membranes. They performed a rescue cerclage even as I started contracting. Against all reason, the stitch took. But I kept contracting. And started bleeding. I spent two weeks in hospital before baby A’s membrane ruptured, and nearly another three before he died. His name was Henry. The nurses had performed a non-stress test that morning, and he was fine. Four hours later, they couldn’t find his heartbeat, and my back had started to ache. I was 27 weeks and 3 days pregnant, a few days away from celebrating the 28-week mark. That evening, septic, I delivered my boys by emergency c-section. We held Henry in the recovery room while we waited four long hours to receive the news that his brother Peter was stable and in the NICU. There he remained for 75 long days. He is almost seven months corrected now, and doing well so far. Sometimes, now, when I’m feeling particularly lucky that Peter is so beautiful and happy, my heart breaks to think that there should be another baby too, also beautiful, also happy.

I’ve been reading your blog for some time now, and it’s given me a great deal of comfort. Thank you.

By: Sharon

Sharon — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 19:22:05 +0000

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By: Amalah

Amalah — Thu, 21 Jan 2010 13:43:43 +0000

“Celebration isn’t a betrayal of grief, and grief isn’t a betrayal of joy.”

Oh, but that is wonderful and so well written.

By: jeannie

jeannie — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 04:14:01 +0000

yes, as the others have said, you are an elegant writer. i seek writers like you in my daily blog reading and believe me, i’ve found but a few. in fact, there are perhaps three or four whose blogs i will call Real Writing. for Eve, and perhaps for you and others like yourselves, do you know Glow in the Woods by the lovely Sweet Salty Kate Inglis? If not, do Google. You won’t regret it. It’s relevant to your post.

By: reenie

reenie — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 03:19:25 +0000

This post was so perfectly perfect. That might seem like an odd sentiment – what part of death is perfect? – but you said so perfectly what a lot of people are so lucky to never know. It’s NOT wrong to be sad that one of your children died when you see another one laughing. It’s NOT wrong to be so busy you didn’t think about him (or her) today. It’s NOT wrong to grieve two years later. I grieve sometimes. And it’s been six years and 4 weeks since we knew our baby wasn’t coming home with us.

You have beautiful words. Thank you for sharing them.

By: Cara

Cara — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 18:44:13 +0000

I’m on my way to Eve’s. Thanks.

By: Editdebs

Editdebs — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 18:31:18 +0000

Thank you so much for this post. It is beautifully written, and I can feel it in my heart.

By: Amelie

Amelie — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 15:17:13 +0000

Thinking of you, and Ames, and Eve and William.

By: Kellie

Kellie — Sun, 17 Jan 2010 04:12:29 +0000

Beautiful post. I have been following Eve’s blog for sometime and am heartbrooken along with many others. Nothing close to what I can only imagine you and her went (are going) through. Thank you for your kind words for Eve!!